Is it just me, or has 2019 gotten off to a rough start!? After having a rather promising (albeit short) Summer vacation; spending it completely immersed in family life and 100% committed to being present in my children’s lives; I was all set to make this new year my own – find my Zen, conquer some new goals, fulfil some longstanding dreams, blog a whole lot more – But my golly gosh, I’ve hit the ground running. One minute I’m feeling like I’ve got this parenting thing under control; and the next minute the universe is laughing at my audacity by sending me a couple of reality checks to bring me back to my senses! I’m barely managing to keep my head above water at this point…and the year has only just begun – yikes! Life really has it down to a fine art of throwing curveballs your way whenever you think you have things under control, isn’t it!
So what’s life been like lately?
For starters, Summer hardly felt like summer at all and the holidays were way too short! Either way, we were in a relatively good space at the start of the school year – a lot more connected and relaxed; but barely 3 weeks in to the 2019 school year, and I’m ready to throw my hands in the air. The struggle to juggle has reached a whole new level of hectic, what with kids in grade 11, 10 and 4 and feeling like I’m constantly driving from pillar to post to meet all the criteria on the endless to-do list. It feels like I was never ready for the 2019 academic year and already have quite a few parenting fails under my belt! But despite all of the chaos, I’ve also really been enjoying this season of motherhood. A real conundrum of sorts. Wherever we are, we’re all in it together, and there’s nothing more comforting than belonging to a unit like that <3
I think what makes things a little harder at this point is having parents who equally need you. Sometimes, we’re so caught up in our own coming of age sagas that we don’t fully realise our own parents’ age. I think that’s one of the hardest parts of growing up…realising that your parents are also getting old. For so long they’ve helped us carry our burdens while also being our biggest cheerleaders; and now it’s time for the roles to reverse. January has certainly set the tempo for things to come; with my mom having another short stay in hospital and currently still on the mend; but it’s been an honour to be able to give back the same care that was once given to me. It’s a privilege not all are lucky enough to bare.
So, as it stands and in a nutshell, life lately is far from glamorous – it’s actually quite hectic! But as the current of life continues to flow, and as the tides are changing once again… As I enter this new season of life – approaching 40, parenting teens and caring for my folks in whichever way I can – As always, I’m ready to adjust my sails and embrace whatever life has in store for me. It might not be how I envisioned the year to go, but I’ve made peace with the fluidity of life and the fact that I might never fully have things under control. In the end, we just keep going on as best we can, and soon enough we realise it’s never just about us. Our lives and stories all overlap and interconnect – where I am now and where my destiny will lead me is more than coincidence; and how I choose to live and embrace this moment will create a ripple effect in my life for years to come. And so you best believe I’ll be putting my best foot forward, paving the way by living a life of intent, and Joan of Arc-ing all the drama out of my way this 2019. Let’s make it a year of good vibes only, shall we?!
Thanks for reading!