Dear opinionated parent with the unsolicited advice I don’t care to hear. If you haven’t figured it out by now – after having to endure years of listening to you babbling on and on about the same thing – I’m not actually taking any of that crap you call advice, seriously. If it isn’t already obvious, I’ve implemented didly squat of what you’ve said; and repeating yourself over and over again is just…well…a waste of breath and fresh air!!
Sure enough you’ve been there, done that and earned the girls scout badge; but you don’t see me badgering on and on about all the things I think you are doing wrong…so leave me and my parenting style the heck alone! I’m all for advice and sharing knowledge and helping each other along on this parenting journey…but I’ve had about enough of your condescending tone and insistence on making me feel like a bad parent.
Standing on a ledge on the outside, looking in and forming an opinion and judging the next persons parenting over a 5 minute observation is quite low class and down right arrogant and rude! And you don’t, in fact, know better than me how to run my life, nor that of my children. I have my own opinion about you and your parenting, but I’ve not made it my business to continuously victimise you by voicing my opinion out loud. Let’s just say that your parenting leaves much to be desired; so fat chance I’ll be listening to you!!
While we all, in some delusional way, aspire to raise intelligent, independent, self-sufficient geniuses…the reality is that the majority of children need some guidance on their path to intellectual greatness. So the next time you happen to walk in on me explaining a Math equation to my child that they didn’t quite grasp…or oohing and aahing over a spectacular piece of art that my child just created, or listening to their ideas for their latest project or assignment – don’t assume that I’m helicopter parenting or that I’m over involved. I’m just a normal parent showing an interest in her 12 year olds schooling career and steering them at times in the right direction when they get a bit too playful – cos God dammit they’re not going to figure it ALL out while I’m cosying up on the sofa writing blog posts and watching TV!!!
The time will come when they learn about Calculus and Trigonometry and Chemical equations, and I won’t remember that shizz…but for now, I don’t see why I should shun my children when I’m still able to help them; thanks to my math skill that is still surprisingly intact (thanks Mr Williams). The time will come in the next year or so, when I might be shut out of their thoughts and they won’t freely come to me for help…or even yet, I won’t be able to help. So you can sure as hell count on it that if I’m able to assist them, I WILL- and it’s got nothing to do with you!!!!
My kids are plenty independent and FYI, I strongly promote independent thinking. But I also promote being present in their lives. Perhaps if you did that more, you wouldn’t be stok siel alleen, peering into someone else’s home and criticising how they parent…cos God knows, you’re far from perfect yourself!!!!