Hey Zee, I can’t believe you’re turning 9 today. Nine whole, frigging years! That’s nine years of me loving you, and nine years of you being my last born and my baby boy! You turn nine whole years today…NINE! And I don’t think I’m prepared for what comes next – the double digits, the tween years and all the other growing up things that’s still on the horizon. But that doesn’t mean that you haven’t done a whole lot of growing already in this past year as you transitioned from eight, to nine.
It’s been a real privilege watching you grow and develop over the last few years…Watching you transition into the nine year old you are today. I watched as you progressed from your Bob the Builder obsession to a Toy Story obsession and eventually into an Avengers super fan and Lego fanatic – and most recently into a bookworm too! I’ve watched as you’ve gained confidence and independence, and how your own individual personality is coming shining through. I’ve watched how you look around and question things – both with your surroundings, as well as the things in life that you’re uncertain about. I’ve watched you transition from a timid little boy, to one who is starting to fully understand his boundaries and rights. And I’ve even watched how you’ve started to talk yourself out of situations that make you feel anxious with an intelligence and reasoning that makes me super proud to be your mom!
I love that you like to figure things out on your own – from a complicated math problem to a school project…you want to do things by yourself and that’s great. I love that you love to learn – that you look at things and wonder…things like lightning and insects and storm clouds… and that you see everything as an opportunity to gain knowledge. You’re inquisitive and enquiring and organised and punctual and all the things that I am not, and sometimes I feel sorry that I am your mom…Because I don’t have all the answers to the questions in your mind. And sometimes because, even if I do have the answers, I don’t always have the patience answer them. But most times I feel privileged to be a part of your wonderful, wonderful world!
I know it’s hard being the littlest one amongst your siblings. That sometimes they tower over you both in height and authority. Gosh, they love to tease you in a way that drives both you and me insane, but I’ve also bare witness to the love that lives between you and the beautiful and close bond you share – from the tender moments with your sister even if she tries to camoflauge it under a scowl; and in the way Rocky still makes time to play Minecraft and pretend wrestling on his bedroom floor. They fight with you- like, a lot -but they do balance it out by doing a lot of things for you too and sometimes it goes unnoticed by me. I’ve come to realise how important your bond with your family is to you and I hope you realise how much you mean to all of us too.
There is a lot of change still to come, but for now I am happy that there are still little remnants left that serves as a evidence that you’re still my baby – like your cuddles, your willing kisses, curling up next to me on my bed like a big human bean bag, and those baby teeth that still flash at me each time you smile. But I’ve also come to realise that those “baby years” are reaching its end and time is running out. I know this because of that single wobbly loose tooth that you refuse to have me pull out – and I don’t fight you on it because I see it as a sign of the beginning of a transition I’m not quite prepared for.
There’s a lot of change to come in the coming years. Soon you will grow past me… and I will inherit the shoes you’ve grown out of too fast like I did with Rocky…and your voice will change and so will your body. Soon, all the gestures that come so naturally now will start to fade and you’ll become a snarky, sarcastic teen – so for now, I’m going to welcome your hugs and kisses- especially the ones you give me when you go to school; and I will lean in a little closer for a tighter squeeze, and I will pull you a little closer when you climb into my bed, and I will try a little harder to listen to all your questions…But most importantly, I’m going to cherish all the days that’s left that you’re still kind of little, because there’s very few of them left before you’ll think you’re too big for all of these things I love about you being my baby.
Happy 9th Birthday Zaydaan! The sky is the limit for you…just keep on believing in yourself and continue working hard… and maybe once in while it would be great if you could take criticism with a pinch of salt too 😉
Love you always,