I really love being a stay at home mom! Sure enough, it comes with it’s own set of sacrifices…but I have made peace with the fact that I can’t do it all, a long time ago. And besides, I am privileged to be able to make a choice. I must admit that I used to look at other women and feel like I missed out on a big chunk of life because I didn’t pursue my career. I felt a little inferior and would slightly cringe dare anyone ask ‘what I did’ for a living. But right now, looking back, although still a sting of regret, I won’t take back the choices I made…because part of the perks of staying at home, means that I get to join the little ones on their school outings!

I remember accompanying Saafiyah and Raqeeb on most of their pre-school outings. It was a way of not missing out on important moments with them. Of being part of everything. I realise now that they have very little recollection of those ‘moments’ and it’s more about me not wanting to lose out on their growing years because those memories lay deeper with me than with them. Yet I seem to be following suit with little Zee!!

 

My mom would argue that I should let go of the apron strings…and I might agree with her if I weren’t clinging so desperately onto the last few years of being ‘needed’! I realise that time is slipping by fast. That very soon Zaydaan will be all grown up and off to Primary School and managing outings without me! He’s really growing up so quickly and maybe, by my attachment, I am trying to slow down the inevitable…

Whatever the case may be, it’s still immensely pleasurable watching little faces light up with new discoveries, listening to my boy converse with his friends on the back seat , have him want me to accompany him still and be a part of the adventure. Hopefully I can sneak peek at it for a little while longer before they all flee the nest and unravel life on their own terms.